


ha pasado

by calcelmo



Category: Twin Peaks
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Slash, Spoilers, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:27:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calcelmo/pseuds/calcelmo
Summary: Harry swallowed. He did not look away. There was a manic glint in Cooper’s dark eyes; not unfamiliar, but concerning in context.“Your attachment to me is unprofessional,” Cooper said.
Relationships: Dale Cooper/Harry Truman
Comments: 5
Kudos: 31





	ha pasado

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for late S1 early S2.

It was a clear night. The stars were beautiful; a million pinpricks of white light against the darkened sky. Purple tonight- not black, or blue. 

When the sky is purple, things feel strange. A static crackles in the air, as if a storm is on the way.

 _The storm has passed. I weathered it,_ Harry thought to himself.

He felt conflicted. Angry at himself, angry at Cooper. He might be embarrassed for being caught out, but he wasn’t ashamed of how he felt. Perhaps he was hurt. 

Although- Coop owed him nothing. They were friends and friends alone.

_But I never asked for anything else._

It was cold out, and moping around wasn’t doing him any good. He needed some sleep. He needs things to go back to how they were before that conversation.

* * *

“Dammit, my eyes are closing,” Cooper sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face. “More caffeine, that’s what I need.”

“How would you feel about something a little stronger?”

A grin spread slowly across Cooper’s face; it was infectious. “I’d feel just fine about it, Harry.”

Harry went over to his desk and took out the bottle of bourbon that was gathering dust in there. He was a third of the way down it, but it had been there for years. He only tended to drink socially; he felt it was important to keep a clear head. 

He poured Cooper a glass and took one for himself. Seating himself back down, he glanced over the reports, skimming over the profile on Jacques Renault. It was late and they’d been going over this for hours, making sure everything was in place, that their information and Cooper’s alias was airtight before they moved in on One Eyed Jack’s tomorrow.

“You sure Ed’s going to be up to this?” 

Harry nodded and took a mouthful of the whisky. “Absolutely. He’s good. He’ll surprise you.”

“Everyone in this town surprises me,” Cooper smiled. He drained the glass, which was jarring. Harry didn’t think they needed liquid courage tonight, and he’d object if anyone said they needed a stiff drink to get themselves through the operation tomorrow. 

Cooper leaned forward, and very deliberately placed his hand on Harry’s knee. Harry didn’t flinch or attempt to remove it, he just sat as still as stone, meeting Cooper’s gaze. Behind his eyes, betraying nothing but perhaps a little curiosity, he asked himself if this could be chalked down to Cooper’s disregard for personal space, and the easy intimacy they’d developed.

It could not.

With his other hand, Cooper plucked the glass out of Harry’s hand, and gracefully twined their fingers together. 

Harry swallowed. He did not look away. There was a manic glint in Cooper’s dark eyes; not unfamiliar, but concerning in context. 

“Your attachment to me is unprofessional,” Cooper said.

It wasn't phrased like an accusation, and detached for the most part, edged with amusement. It hit Harry like a train. 

From anyone else, the phrasing implied it had been rehearsed, premeditated. But Cooper was nothing if not spontaneous. He might have decided to humiliate Harry in this split second. He might have been building up to it. It didn’t really matter.

Harry pushed Cooper’s hands away from him and stood up. Things he could say ran through his mind, appearing as chalk on a blackboard, but in the end he decided to say nothing. He did not trust himself to say anything. 

He left. He wasn’t followed.

The next morning could have been excruciatingly awkward. As it was, Harry did everything he could to avoid interacting with Cooper, while still doing his job. The more he thought about it, the angrier he felt. The accusation that he wasn’t a professional- that he’d been careless or predatory or overbearing, cut deep. He’d been so preoccupied with the case and the wellbeing of the townspeople that he’d only examined his feelings for Cooper at a surface level.

_I like him. I like spending time with him and being his friend, even though he’s strange, and different to the rest of us._

Cooper had gone a step further and interpreted this to mean ‘I want to commit sodomy’. The problem was this: Cooper was never wrong. Cooper knew psychology and he also read body language with unmatched skill.

Harry wasn’t going to deny that he cared disproportionately about the FBI agent. But he rejected the idea that he’d been anything other than subtle about it. He was sexually and romantically involved with a woman. He and Cooper were friends. Hand on heart, he would be happy to keep it that way. 

Hawk, Andy, Lucy, Ed. All of them picked up on the strange tension between them. Their tangible fondness for each other had dispersed like pine needles in a gust of wind. 

Still. They made it through, the perfect team. Ed _was_ up to the job, and Harry would freely admit that Cooper’s manipulation of Renault was nothing short of masterful. 

The day’s end brought a long night.

When William called and told him Cooper had been shot, the ground gave out beneath him. His voice cracked when he said he was on his way. Hawk and Andy were silent, bathed in the sirens’ red and blue light. Harry’s knuckles were white on the steering wheel, and dimly, he accepted that Cooper had been right.

“Doc’s on his way, Sheriff,” Hawk told him. 

Harry took off his hat and knelt down next to Cooper. Blood had seeped heavily into the fabric of his shirt.

“Check for any signs of the gunman.” 

He sounded far away to his own ears. His anger at his friend had melted away and replaced itself with a sick, multiplying worry. It was possessive. Consuming. 

Cooper’s lashes cast shadows on his cheekbones. He was pale and breathing shallowly. He opened his eyes, and met Harry’s gaze, searching his face.

“Pathetic place to die,” he whispered.

“You’re not going to die.”

“No,” Coop sighed. “But it _would_ have been pathetic.”

His hand came up from his side, outstretched, reaching. Harry narrowed his eyes, but he took it anyway. Cooper’s fingers were cold and clammy. They weakly squeezed against his. 

“You know it was an observation. Not a criticism.”

It sounded like Cooper couldn’t breathe properly around the words, and they were difficult to force out.

“You’ve been shot. Save your energy,” Harry said mildly. If they were going to talk about this, they were going to do it when he wasn’t one foot in the spirit world.

Cooper laughed, but it came out as this awful wheezing sound. He coughed. Harry couldn’t help it; his other hand went to rest on Cooper’s forehead, smoothing through his hair. 

“Truly, I didn’t intend to upset you,” Cooper murmured. “I was… flattered. A little surprised. I read you as heterosexual.”

“I am,” Harry answered pointedly.

Cooper grinned, although it seemed to hurt to do so, his eyes fluttering closed. “Harry, I have the greatest respect for you. And you’re my friend.”

Harry tightened his grip on Cooper’s hand. That was right. Whatever the man had seen manifest through his subconscious, it didn’t have to be a problem.Despite the small amount of time they’d known each other, he knew that Cooper passing away would have an insurmountable impact on him; just as Cooper coming into his life had done.

It seemed wrong to think sexuality came into the equation. He didn’t fantasize, he didn’t yearn. He just cared. He just loved and protected and _cared._ So much. Too much.

The doctor’s car pulled up outside. He could hear Hawk and Andy’s footsteps down the hall. 

“You could kiss me now, if you want. I mean, I _know_ you want.”

Harry smiled ruefully and did no such thing. “Stop talking now, Coop.”


End file.
